Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Hottest Baseball Players: #7

The 7th hottest baseball player is....

David Wright

David Wright looks like one of those pompous,
jerky jocks who we all loved to hate in high school.

Here are all the reasons why we should hate him envy him worship him.

He's hot.

He's almost always smiling, so he obviously has an enchanted existence.

He's a man's man. He likes to clown around with the other cool guys, like Delgado.

He can get away with shit like this.
The guy whose cap he's fondling is Fred Wilpon, the OWNER of the Mets.

He made the All-Star team...

...and got to hang with Big Papi.

He loves to show off his nice butt, even when just hanging with the guys.

His John Hancock is worth mad cash. And he wears Abercrombie.

The ladies love it when he plays bartender. And you totally know he's making everyone drink Jager shots, fully knowing how much everyone hates Jagermeister.

He smokes Cubans to celebrate winning the division. And you totally know that he doesn't smoke, but wants to exude the air of machismo.

He's clever. He named his blog "Wright Now".
But only after deciding against "Shut up, beyotch, I'm Wright".

And he gives back. He started The David Wright Foundation, which raises funds for MS research & treatment, the Make-A-Wish Foundation, and other charitable foundations. This makes it impossible to hate him. No matter how much you want to.

Finally, David Wright completes the Official Mets Triumvirate of Hotness, which also includes Reyes and Beltran.

Here they are, being hot in their All Star uniforms...

Here they are, filming a commercial or something, and looking damn hot.

They are clearly the cool kids.
Look at them ignoring Jason Bay.
He hates them because they gave him a wedgie earlier that day.

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